The impostor syndrome

If doubt can be an ally, it can also be a thief of self-confidence! Attention…

We could simplify everything: you run, you're a runner, you ride, you're a cyclist. This type of statement is true and fair...as much as saying, you make a cake, you are a pastry chef. Say the same, it's boring huh? Let us therefore continue with this apparently elitist reasoning; let's say you run like a baker makes bread, so you're a "real" runner, let's say that as a real runner you sign up for the Montreal marathon (again, you're beginning to understand that you find it annoying my reasoning, huh?), well, it's to win it, isn't it? Ok, are you a real runner but not a real competitor? I'm mixed up there... 

It is somewhat because of all these nuances that the impostor syndrome easily interferes in our thoughts. As a general rule, we totally ignore the "controlled appellations" and we do our little business with great happiness, but the fact remains that human beings are like that; he compares himself and a part of him undeniably wants, whether he likes it or not, to be part of the gang! My opinion? As long as the impostor syndrome does not prevent you from doing your sport or participating in competitions, well, the deal is ketchup! But it's never that simple...

The culture of doubt

In life as in hockey (am I quoting a Nestlé Quick ad?), we often encounter this syndrome also called the self-taught complex. For me who comes from the world of the arts, well this syndrome, we eat it at every meal; it is part of our fuel. Comedians who play, comedians who animate, sculptors who paint, painters who print, novelists who write poetry, poets who write theatre, essayists who try... In short, "in" culture, we cultivate it. The thing is that in creation, doubt is often fruitful. It pushes to questioning, provokes introspection and stimulating situations, and makes the artist take new corridors of reflections and reflexes. But for you the athlete, well this syndrome can be more counterproductive than anything else.

False modesty and true pretension

If you read " Anything is possible…really? ", you will have understood that I believe that an adequate dose of doubt can fortunately ensure that you do not register too early for challenges for which you are not ready and that you at least do the prescribed preparation for succeed, without injury, in the sizeable objectives, as attractive as they are trying, that you have set for yourself. But you have to be careful not to tip over to the other side, to the side of "too much is never enough" to show those you look up to in the wrong place that you are not (or will not remain) an impostor. Ok, it's a bit of cheap psychology, but it's a bit what awaits the victim of the syndrome. In the marvelous world of social media, the amateur sportsman (both in the noble sense and in the banal sense of the term) reads the publications of members of his club or the sportsmen of his entourage, forgetting that a large number of his motivational "shares torn between false modesty and genuine pretension. Our "friends" may be battling the damn syndrome too, who knows?

 Still, on the web, you can find everything: Spiderman (of course), Ironman and Batman. But you, do you have a special gift, an extraordinary history or the wealth of Bruce Wayne? If you suffer from the syndrome, think about it before training 20 hours a week or buying yourself a Cervelo P5... Probably you can train properly and enjoy your competitions without letting yourself be influenced, or even undermined, through blockbuster adventures and without buying the spectacular toys/equipment you find on social media.

The Masked Syndrome

Imposter syndrome is a kind of bouquet-garnish of anxiety and lack of self-confidence. Psychologists, sorry to cut corners, but my studies in the psychoanalytical approach to the literary phenomenon are very far ("distant" my mother used to say), and my brief stay as a "researcher" in a psychiatric institution taught me more about the privacy of my fellow graduate students than on psychology. So this bouquet-garni, I say, can infuse our brains and release a scent of imposture throughout our being, which ultimately leads us to deny all our merit and all our successes. Hello medals and podiums and hello "can I swim in your hallway even though I'm not a machine like you guys". And that is when the impostor dares to swim with people. Often, his fear of being unmasked pushes him to swim only on Facebook. It is only there that we see that there is a swimming pool in his life. Facebook becomes one of its defense strategies. Facebook is both his weapon and his executioner. The impostor can waste energy and time looking like… If you read Kwai? Yes; kwai?, you have seen that there is a whole list of accessories that the triathlete can protect himself from (I always take him as an example because I know him a little and it is quite rare that he sues me ), for example, to help him look serious. If the triathlete has the financial means (it happens quite often, let's say), goodbye to the syndrome (at least on Facebook, because on Sportstats it's another matter…)! Finally…we won't dwell on this, but it's easy to make connections with other sports and other fields. "Gallows contests" are everywhere, and the image too often serves as a safe-conduct. How many times have I heard the saying "I'll never believe anyone who can't ride if they've bothered to buy an $8,000 bike"...and yet. But making up your imposture with accessories is harmless. And if you have the means, have fun as much as you want, who cares. But where it gets tricky is that the syndrome, in the long run, can cause pain. I know, I know, you hadn't seen it the same way. You saw the syndrome as a coquetry. But no. It hurts.

The faces of suffering

Have you seen those suffering faces in marathons or Ironmans? I know, you think Charles forces more face than legs when he runs otherwise he would finish faster. That could be. I don't know Charles well, and I don't give a damn about his face. The suffering I am talking about is the very real one that resides in the sadness of some who feel left out. The suffering I am talking about is also that caused by overtraining (or burnout in other areas). This kind of suffering worries me more than the physical suffering linked to an ordeal. The latter, I "handle" better, or at the very least, I feel better equipped to deal with it.

So, yes, impostor syndrome can hurt and lead to non-comic matters like overtraining. It's crazy, I started writing on the subject by talking about a feeling of imposture that everyone experienced to different degrees and which had very few consequences (light subject if any) to finally dig up deeper stuff…I should have done my promised article on educational or a Gatorade/Powerade duel. Finally. Still, devoting too much of your time and energy to a sport compared to the attention that this discipline really requires of you to get it right, well, that can be a symptom of the syndrome of the impostor. The victim (often unconscious) will take revenge on a huge volume of training because he does not believe in his real abilities, and, deep down, he wants his place (his podium, his medal, his qualification, his acceptance or whatever…). Result: overtraining, disappointment, injury...

The perverse effects

I lost you? Two cases; Charlie and Jacques. You will love them, Charline and Jacques. Two good people who never asked to be the subject of an article. First Charline (who is more interesting than Charles and his face which forces), very average triathlete (according to Sportstats who is not always in the lace) but immensely devoted. She looks like most of us, maybe a little more capable than most of us, but like us, she spent too much on a bike that was too good for her abilities, she paid dearly for specialists (nutritionist , osteo, physio, training plans and private coaching) and her sedentary relatives believe that she is a machine that will make the next Olympics even if she is 42 years old. Do you see that she looks like us? But unlike most of us, Charline trains more than 20 hours a week publicly (viva Facebook, Strava and Garmin Connect), and probably 5, 6 more hours in secret in weird peripheral sports that she prefers to remain silent at the risk of being excommunicated from the community of serious triathletes.

 Result: we masked her too many posts on Facebook, we all noticed that her performance was falling like the Dow Jones on skis and above all, that she tipped over to the dark side of the force, that she became paranoid (ok , she was already a little), that she risks losing her job, that she has lost her boyfriend, her cat, and that she is losing herself in the middle of a passion that does not announced however that the beautiful. Charline subconsciously wanted to be part of the herd too much. These actions are now reactions. We no longer believe too much in his smile which was so beautiful. Unlike Charles, she smiles, but she smiles too much. She does too much. you read The group effect? Well Charline is a product of the perverse effect of the group. At first, joining a club transformed her positively, then, little by little, she stopped respecting herself and her development and began to run at the pace of others, to run to injuries. , to compare yourself… I who believe so much in the spirit of a club and in the enthusiasm that reigns there, must admit that it doesn't always work… especially if you have real impostor syndrome.

Jacques, on the other hand, is a racing god. He's qualified for Boston multiple times and wears the toughest compression stockings. flash in the city. Very brilliant and strategic in his choice of competitions and his understanding of training, he knows how to successfully combine work, family and sport. He is also a solid triathlete (Jacques inspired me ‘The triathlete is also a runner you know?), but it is definitely in his sneakers that he stands out when it comes to sports. Nobody could believe that he could be a victim of the famous syndrome, not even him, and yet. In a flirtatious way, of course, he feels a bit like a runner when he's with triathletes and a bit like a triathlete with runners, but that's mostly excuses to explain that he "only" 2h56 on marathon and "only" 10h15 on Ironman (we have the failures we can…). But Jacques is a victim of the syndrome because he doesn't compare himself to the stocky little ones like me, no, he rather sticks to the pros who do it full time. Result: Jacques had a stress fracture just before Boston this year, he became momentarily aggressive (even with his eldest son when usually Jacques is the best father there is), he even thought of taking dope from performance (just 10 seconds…but he thought about it) and he is no longer menstruating because his body is reacting (ok…maybe I have the story wrong on this point). In short, overtraining partially linked to the bad syndrome (it's me who says it, not a mental health professional, therefore, to be taken with a grain of salt). The saddest thing, Jacques feels that he has failed when he has really succeeded on many points.

All this text is finally only a preamble to ask you to stop saying that you suffer from the syndrome of the impostor when it is not really what you live (others suffer from it for real; pay attention to the words), and simply to remind us all, me first, not to take ourselves for another, except at night in our wildest dreams. A little balance never killed anyone.

Good season!